That fateful day, five years ago
Sep. 11th, 2006 09:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
greatbearI took the morning off from work on September 11. My Mom, being the world traveler she is, was to fly out that morning to Europe for two weeks in various Scandanavian countries, with a lot of time spent in Amsterdam. Mom was totally excited. She was getting her last minute packing done, I was futzing around the house, the television in the other room playing to an audience of none at the time. Mom passed through the kitchen, saw the early news reports and told me of a fire at the World Trade Center. I flip on the set in the bedroom, and sat transfixed at what I saw. Initially I did not know what happened, and wondered what could cause such a huge fire in a concrete-and-steel building. Less than a minute later I learned that a jetliner struck the building. Okay, makes sense, that would certainly cause the destruction I was seeing. Anyone who knows me well knows that my brain does not fully function for at least an hour after I awaken at best. I was processing the scene before me through that morning brain-haze when I saw the second plane hit. It was that image that busted through the grogginess and enveloped me in fear. Why would someone deliberately attack Manhattan? I was thinking of all my friends who live and work in NYC and the danger they were in. It was not registering to me yet that this was an attack in the U.S., after all, no one does that sort of thing. I stared at the screen, as did Mom, but she continued packing.
It became clear that the U.S. was under attack. I looked at Mom, getting set for her trip. She told me she intends to go on her trip. It was about that time that the scene cut to the Pentagon. This was closer to home for us. This is where both our hearts sank, uncertainty set in, and neither of us knew what to do. Mom, never letting fear get in her way, had all her stuff ready for the trip. By now we've seen the WTC buildings collapse, the fire at the Pentagon rage on, and the reports of unaccounted airliners. Airports closed down, flights grounded. Mom still wanted to head to the airport, "just in case". Frustrated me, I grudgingly took her to the airport, listening to the radio the whole way in. I guess she needed to see it for herself as we were turned away at BWI airport. I knew where she was coming from though, her fearless determination coupled with never having to deal with such an occurance made us go through these motions.
We got home, Mom visibly disappointed, and, for the first time, obviously shaken by the ordeal. I hugged her tight, began crying and told her how glad that she was at home, and not in the air at the time. I then resumed what I was doing prior to leaving the house, which was trying to get in touch with my friends in NYC. Through various means I found out that some of my friends were okay, but there were some unknowns. Rather than go into work later that day as I had planned, I stayed home, watched events unfold, worried what was to happen next. I was very grateful that Mom was 'stuck at home', even though she was disappointed at missing out on her trip.
That day was so surreal for me, and the days following were no less bizarre. Returning to work brought an eerie silence before I came in from the parking lot. My employer's facilities are situated between two active runways at BWI airport. With no planes in the air, on the tarmac, no traffic clogging the roads around the airport, the reality set in. Living not far from noteable goverment buildings (NSA, for one), I felt too close for comfort. Hearing fighter jets in the air at random times at night made for restless attempts at sleep, frazzled nerves and the raw feeling of lost security. The following weeks eased the tension somewhat, but profound changes had taken place with me, friends, colleagues and people around me. One thing was unmistakeable, a cooperation between people that had never happened in my lifetime. You could see the determination in others to not let anything happen like the past recent events.
The years following these horrid events have found our nation divided, liberties trampled, goodwill and compassion for our country squandered, and countless people dead in a war waged with a sovereign nation under false pretenses. I mark the fifth anniversary of the terrorist attacks with distrust of my own government. I mark it with holding my friends close. I mark it with the same determination that Mom had in her everyday life. I mark it with disgust for those who have profitted from the war, the loss of individual liberties, the secret courts, torture prisons, radical Islam, radical Xtianity and the political/idealogical divide we now face. But I still have hope. I have hope because those terrible events have allowed me to see not the dark side of humanity, but all of the good that humanity is capable of.
It became clear that the U.S. was under attack. I looked at Mom, getting set for her trip. She told me she intends to go on her trip. It was about that time that the scene cut to the Pentagon. This was closer to home for us. This is where both our hearts sank, uncertainty set in, and neither of us knew what to do. Mom, never letting fear get in her way, had all her stuff ready for the trip. By now we've seen the WTC buildings collapse, the fire at the Pentagon rage on, and the reports of unaccounted airliners. Airports closed down, flights grounded. Mom still wanted to head to the airport, "just in case". Frustrated me, I grudgingly took her to the airport, listening to the radio the whole way in. I guess she needed to see it for herself as we were turned away at BWI airport. I knew where she was coming from though, her fearless determination coupled with never having to deal with such an occurance made us go through these motions.
We got home, Mom visibly disappointed, and, for the first time, obviously shaken by the ordeal. I hugged her tight, began crying and told her how glad that she was at home, and not in the air at the time. I then resumed what I was doing prior to leaving the house, which was trying to get in touch with my friends in NYC. Through various means I found out that some of my friends were okay, but there were some unknowns. Rather than go into work later that day as I had planned, I stayed home, watched events unfold, worried what was to happen next. I was very grateful that Mom was 'stuck at home', even though she was disappointed at missing out on her trip.
That day was so surreal for me, and the days following were no less bizarre. Returning to work brought an eerie silence before I came in from the parking lot. My employer's facilities are situated between two active runways at BWI airport. With no planes in the air, on the tarmac, no traffic clogging the roads around the airport, the reality set in. Living not far from noteable goverment buildings (NSA, for one), I felt too close for comfort. Hearing fighter jets in the air at random times at night made for restless attempts at sleep, frazzled nerves and the raw feeling of lost security. The following weeks eased the tension somewhat, but profound changes had taken place with me, friends, colleagues and people around me. One thing was unmistakeable, a cooperation between people that had never happened in my lifetime. You could see the determination in others to not let anything happen like the past recent events.
The years following these horrid events have found our nation divided, liberties trampled, goodwill and compassion for our country squandered, and countless people dead in a war waged with a sovereign nation under false pretenses. I mark the fifth anniversary of the terrorist attacks with distrust of my own government. I mark it with holding my friends close. I mark it with the same determination that Mom had in her everyday life. I mark it with disgust for those who have profitted from the war, the loss of individual liberties, the secret courts, torture prisons, radical Islam, radical Xtianity and the political/idealogical divide we now face. But I still have hope. I have hope because those terrible events have allowed me to see not the dark side of humanity, but all of the good that humanity is capable of.
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no subject
Date: 2006-09-12 03:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-12 06:09 am (UTC)I've been more affect by the Desert Storm than of 9/11 believe it or not.
But I too hold out hope that things will be better.
Hugs