greatbear: (forearms)
Very rarely does any sort of advertising make me want to run out and buy a particular product. To trap me, your ad has to be clever, funny, memorable and especially, does not treat me as an idiot. One of the better things to do for my attention is to put the product through some sort of torture test. Few such companies have done this as well as Blendtec, with their "Will It Blend" series on the web.

Blendtec, of course, is the commercial blender company that also produces ridiculously expensive, commercial-grade versions for home use. To boast of the machine's capability, they will blend things that one would normally not put through a blender. Everything from cameras to cell phones, rake handles, hockey pucks, you name it, they run it through the machine. I like a healthy dose of destruction now and then. For the record, the blender does a number on everything run through it. Well, in their latest installment, I am one step closer to having one of these $500 machines. Why? Their latest victim is none other than an iPhone. Finally, something to counteract all the hype and practically religious praise I've been hearing everywhere for weeks on end.

Now, before any Apple loyalists blast me for reveling in the destruction of one of the most anticipated and hallowed gadgets, as Blendtec has done before, the remains are being auctioned off on eBay, along with some swag AND a new Blendtec blender, with all of the proceeds going to the Primary Children's Medical Center. As I write this, the bid is up to $1,126. Last time this was done (it was a powdered iPod that time!), the winning bid was a few grand. So, it's destruction for a good cause. Even if that cause makes a few people cringe. ;)

iYawn

Jan. 9th, 2007 10:52 pm
greatbear: (making persian cats)
So, the biggest announcement out of Macworld was the inevitable iPhone. Yeah, it's sleek, has a cool touchscreen, undoubtedly gets completely smudged by fingerprints and cheek grease thereby spawning a huge raft of aftermarket cases and skins to keep it as pristine as possible...

Still, it's just a glorified cell phone. Worse yet, it is also a Blackberry-like email/PIM/PDA/net tablet. The latter fact will surely cause a rise in dazed, inattentive-to-their-surroundings automatons wandering sidewalks and hallways creating traffic jams and running into other people, and dont get me started about those who will use it as such while driving. I guess I will get double points while 'Blackberry Bowling*' if I manage to cause an iPhone-to-floor interface.

Sorry, I just cannot get excited about a tiny gadget that causes large monthly bills and adding to already poor behavior among the gadget distracted.

I made a joke about this quite a while back, and apparently it's a reality now. It appears that John Cage's groundbreaking work 4'33" is available as a ringtone. For those unaware if this piece, it is written for piano, and consists of four minutes and thirty-three seconds of blissful silence. If you ask me, this should be the default ringtone built into every phone made.

* "Blackberry Bowling" is the name I have given to a new contact sport that I currently engage in. It is played with two people. Me, and ostensibly an oblivious, self-absorbed yuppie type using a Blackberry, Treo, or other similar handheld device. The game starts with said device user walking through a corridor or hallway completely enthralled with his device and not paying attention to where he is walking. If this person is on a collision course with me coming in the opposite direction, I will prepare myself for the collision rather than take evasive maneuvers. I will usually let out a warning a split-second prior to the collision, whereupon I lead with my shoulder and take the impact. A bonus point is awarded to me if the collision causes the dropping of the device. It seems appropriate to double the bonus points if the dropped device is the new iPhone, simply due to the outrageous cost of the unit. Please not that in none of these instances am I the 'aggressor', i.e. I am not walking down the center of the aisle nor do I cause the actual 'hit'. Blackberry Bowling is a game played off the gutter, similar to a good roll in tenpins. I simply take the 'hit' when I have nowhere else to go. I simply lead with the shoulder and a stiff arm.

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Phil

December 2016

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