Now what?

[greatbear]

Ever get that sinking feeling that something is really wrong? Well, I'm right in the midst of it right now. While having my ct scan done Thursday the technicians seemed to have spent an unusually long time from the time my scan was done before the one came in and said I was done. She was a bit uneasy compared to when I had arrived, saying that my doctor should have the results for me the next day or Monday. Okay, fine. I've had plenty of ct scans done before, and those times when there was nothing truly serious, things moved along lightly and rather brisk. While at work on Friday I get not one but two messages on the machine here at home urging me in for a follow-up visit, one from the staff, one from my doctor. He too seemed a bit more serious in tone than usual. More red flags. Does not help that a couple days ago I had a bout with the most serious nosebleeds I have ever had. Not sure exactly the cause, but I am assuming I bopped myself in the face when I was startled awake by the phone in the middle of the night. My nose hurt like it was hit, then the blood started flowing. And flowing. And, yes, I was alone at the time. Anyone who has slept with me (hush now) knows that I am a kicking, twitching squirmfest in my sleep. My nose would start bleeding again, taking 20 minutes or more to stop. Five or so occurances of this. It's been okay now for the last couple days.

You know? I really dont need anything else truly serious like this in my life, especially when it comes to my own health. I don't "sick" well at all. I help others when they are sick. I prefer to remain alone when I am ill.

Maybe it's nothing. Maybe it's something truly awful. I'm hoping for the former. I'll be expecting something approaching the latter.

Comments

[lfkbear.livejournal.com]

I know that it's easy for me to say, but try not to live through what hasn't happened. Positive mindset can be a significant element to keeping healthy, hokey as it might sound.

Take good care. xo

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Larry. You rock. :-)

[lfkbear.livejournal.com]

Nah! I just try to be honest and helpful to the folks I like. Take good care of yourself. xo

[digibob.livejournal.com]

Sending you good thoughts and hope it all works out. Sorry you have to spend the weekend worrying about it.

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

Thanks to people like you, I can have nice distractions from it.

Thank you for the good vibes!

[mhkrabat.livejournal.com]

I certainly second the sentiments of those two posts before me. It's real easy to read too much into non-verbs and it's worse yet when you do hear things verbally but no one's saying much. While I mean no offence to those among us in the medical profession, and they have no monopoly on the malady, they are frequently guilty of giving little thought to what you may "read-into" when for example; the office calls to suggest or urge a follow-up.

Those who know you, as well as those who don't (such as yrs trly) naturally wish you well in any case. I suppose it complicates things that we should express those well-wishes now that there's a sense of concern looming. I truly hope it's nothing at all. I mean; you surely have any number of blasts on the Tail of the Dragon ahead of you!

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

I hope this is nothing. As far as being sick goes, I am feeling well on the road to recovery, so that's a good sign. My appetite has yet to return, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. My doctor is way overbooked these days thanks to the sorry state of medical care in the area, and as much as I have liked him over the years, I think it's time to search for someone else, if it is possible to find one who is not stuck running an assembly line.

I have some suspension goodies out in the garage to fit to the Mini and plan on running the piss out of it next year at the Dragon at least one weekend.

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

Thanks, buddy. ;-)

And thanks for the call earlier. Wish I was there to loofah your back! :-D

[danthered.livejournal.com]

Thinking kindly of you, Phil.

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

Danke!

No news is good news........

[pauliebearsf.livejournal.com]

Sending positive thoughts your way......

xoxoxooxoxoxo

Re: No news is good news........

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

*HUGS*

Thanks!

[kspsibear.livejournal.com]

Just keep us posted, Phil. I pray that it isn't serious. BIG HUGS to you!!!

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

Thanks, big guy. It really means a lot. I mean it.

[theevilnub.livejournal.com]

doctors. bah!

*hugs*

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

Ya know, the main reason I hate getting seriously ill or injured is that I have to deal with the medical field. It's not that I hate doctors or fear needles or anything silly like that, I just cant take dealing with office staff, bureaucracy, procedure, paperwork and a million other steps before even seeing the actual doctor and the layers upon layers of bullshit that surrounds and separates all of them that you have to go through when things are serious. Then there is the relatively rare case when the actual doctor or specialist is a total ass. The whole ordeal feels like a cross between do-it-yourself piecemeal medical care and needless expense. Then comes the endless headaches with insurance and bills. I am still getting the occasional bill from out of nowhere from an incident over three years ago, and the deep research I have to do finds that it was already paid by insurance way back when. This happens to nearly everyone I know. Double-dipping and charging. Blargh.

[lukebacca.livejournal.com]

Good jujuvibes coming your way, buddy... I'll have to drive over, lift you up, flip you over and shake all the bad stuff right out!

[thepozlife.livejournal.com]

I'm sending positive thoughts your way.

[le-lapin.livejournal.com]

[baeritone.livejournal.com]

I love you.

[quirkstreet.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking of you.

[liftinmoose.livejournal.com]

I hope yer right. Keep us posted. I'm nervous and anxious right here beside you.

[bearlover.livejournal.com]

*hugs*. Hopefully everything turns out all right.

Doh! That last comment was from me.

[beastbriskett.livejournal.com]

Here's to the possibility that the staff was just distracted, and there's nothing wrong at all.

I'm glad your'e taking care of yourself, regardless. Hugs to ya!